Modified Goals

Dislcaimer: Three categories of statements in this post:

1) Some of these statements are very serious.
2) Some of these statements are very unserious.
3) Some of these statements are confusing even to me. I don’t know if I mean them or not.

My backup plan for life since I decided to be a nurse and not a lawyer has been to go to law school if I’m 32 and not in a serious relationship with no prospects of having a family. Women who are 32 and not in a serious relationship are kidding themselves if they think they still have prospects of having a family. Except my mom. She’s an exception.

Anyway, my new back up plan is to go to med school and become a surgeon. My experience today was that life changing. Not an eye surgeon though. That’s too meticulous. Orthopedics all the way. It was the most badass thing I’ve ever seen in my whole life and I want to be wearing the green scrubs and giving someone a new hip.

Also, at lunch today, there was a realistic discussion about childbirth from people who have given birth. And I have decided that I do not want to ever do that. Plus, I just finished The Kite Runner which was single-handedly the most devastating book I have ever read and there’s no way I could have my own child now. I will adopt if I ever have kids. And I’ve mentioned before how no man wants to adopt kids unless he can’t have his own kids. So the odds of me being in a serious relationship with the prospects of a family at 32 are very slim. So someday I will be replacing hips. It’s almost a given.

And even if my biology takes over and I decide I do want to have kids, I probably can’t because I think I accidentally got x-rayed today in the post-op area. I walked past a door just as the x-ray guy with the portable x-ray machine pressed the x-ray button or however that works and it went off when I was unaware and unprotected.

X-rays straight to the ovaries. I’m probably barren. And totally ok with it. I hope this blase attitude doesn’t come back to haunt me someday. Like if I do want to have kids and I’m devastated that I can’t, I’ll think back to this day and realize how stupid and foolish and ungrateful I was.

But for now, I see my future role as everyone’s favorite aunt. Who also gives people new hips. And has 3 dogs.